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Booth's Blog: "You're not welcome round these parts!"
By James Whittington, Wednesday 1st March 2017
All is not well down on the farm in a spooky, eccentric, and very British horror this Friday night...

One thing's for certain; if you ever hear anyone saying 'Strangers don't fare well in these parts..." it's time to start running if you know anything about how these scenarios tend to work out. So why is it that as soon as we go off grid and embark on any kind of rural adventure, things go disastrously wrong? Why are rural folks so, well... frightening?! It is probably one of the main themes that links horror films from across the globe! In America, you head out to the hills and get eaten by cannibals, in Britain, you get disemboweled by a demented farmer, and this Friday they do not get more demented than this!

The Cottage is a 2008 independent horror that stars the quirky talents of Reece Shearsmith and Andy Serkis as two brothers, one spineless, the other tough, respectively. They make the somewhat terrible decision to kidnap their mobster boss's daughter (Jennifer Ellison) and hide out in a remote 'cottage'. But the inept brothers are in well above their heads, in a situation that snowballs totally out of control when their 'victim' does not quite turn out to be the damsel in distress they'd hoped, but a potty-mouthed tough nut of a Liverpudlian who refuses to stay tied up for long as she literally head butts her way out of trouble. This, however, is the least of their problems when both kidnappers and 'kidnappee' wind up lost in the woods in the dead of night, trespassing on the land of a deformed, demented farmer who proceeds to chop, slice, and dice to his twisted heart's content.

The Cottage-WEB3

It is surprisingly hard to make a comedy horror in equal measures; often the films can fall into that dangerous territory of not really knowing what it wants to be. With that in mind, The Cottage is a film of two halves, the first peppered with that quintessential Brit humour; wit, sarcasm, and brilliantly tuned character idiosyncrasies courtesy of the brilliant Serkis and Shearsmith (now that's a double act!) Then the film turns into all out horror with our disfigured farmer using an array of farming implements to mutilate his victims - you can be sure of a lot of gore on the floor here!

From Paul Andrew Williams, the director of London to Brighton and Cherry Tree Lane, this dark comedy horror is well worth a butcher's hook.

The Cottage makes its network premiere this Friday 3rd March at 10.55pm.


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